Awkward

Sometimes, I have these insecure, awkward moments whenever I'm at a shopping mall at KL or in public or whatever and I don't really expect to meet anyone I know at those places because those things happen only once in a blue moon (but it has happened before but that's for another post lol) but when it does suddenly happen more than 'once in a blue moon', I'll suddenly freak out and run away.

It has happened countless times and the people that I met notice me and saw me running away which is very funny. Not embarrassing to me because I don't really want to talk to them but it was just funny. Most of the time, I was already too late to run away so I tried to hide my face but we were too close for them to not notice me at all. The hardest part of it all is having a non-awkward 'normal' conversation with them as if we just met there and then.

I have tried to not be awkward in front of people but I fail.. every time. That's why I prefer running away rather than dealing and getting anxious and nervous over acting normal in front of these people like I'm not about to get a heart attack in the middle of our conversation. I know, I know.. it's weird.

I really can't help it *cries in the corner* Even though I always complain on twitter about how alone I am and how lonely I feel whenever I see people are hanging out with their friends or going on dates with their partners while I'm walking alone with a resting-bitch face that people tend to assume that I'm unapproachable. Which is not true. It's just my face, man.

This is why I always wish to be more outgoing or fun as a person so that things would be easier. But, I'll always find myself running away over and over again. I'm so weird, I know. Or do other people do that too? I dunno, probably.

I'm so scared for when I enter college. It'll be so much more lonelier and awkwad-er. I'd probably get multiple heart attacks every 5 seconds and then faint. Gosh, I'd do anything to become the opposite of this. It stresses me out for even thinking about it. Oh well, wish me luck! :)

Life
Is
Strange... geddit? :p