I had the greatest dream last night!
It started of like this, I went to Las Vegas with some of my friends. We went to a convention centre. It was about plants, wood and stuff. We went to the theater to watch some of the people there talk about how wood were made. And, one of the spokeperson who is a girl, made a 16 year old boy and girl out of wood. They were really life-like and they really looked like humans. The girl joined the other group while the boy joined my group with some of my friends. I forgot his named but it started with an 'M'. He was really handsome and very kind.
After the presentation was finished, M, my friends and I went to some places. We rode a van and visited a lot of interesting places. M and I was really close, we were like a couple! We kept on holding hands and followed each other everywhere. It was amazing. *sigh* ...so anyway, we went to malls and stuff and stayed together for 1 whole week. We talked to each other and connected a lot. And I think there was a part when my friends, M and I had to run from someone. Haha, that was fun. After we ran, we walked to somewhere while M and I held hands.
All of us went to another convention centre and learned more about woods and stuff. We sat in the theater room again on one row. A few girls behind us kept on saying that M is ugly and whatnot, and I scolded them until the presentation started. So after that, we went to another mall. Suddenly, M said, "I'm gonna die tomorrow..." and I felt kind of sad. He said that his creator forgot to put something on him so that he'll live longer. But I expected it to happen anyway since he was made completely out of wood. I didn't cry, though. I just felt sad. I told a friend of mine about it and she also felt sad.
I held his hand and said that I'll be okay. So he took my hand and we walked together the whole mall. After that, we rode the van until it was already nighttime. We stopped at a mosque to pray. My friends and I got in and there were a lot of people in there. And then I realized that I can't pray. So I got out, and searched for the van but I couldn't find it.
And then, I had to ride one of my teacher's car. He helped me to find the van. But we couldn't find it anywhere so he dropped me off at the street. Suddenly, it was already daytime. There were a lot of people there, celebrating something. So, I walked pass everyone and searched for the van. There were too many cars so I had to look slowly.
I still couldn't find the van. And then, I woke up... to the sound of my niece crying.
It was kind of upsetting since I didn't get to see M before he died. I didn't want the dream to end at all. I wanted to know the ending. The real one. But, I guess, the ending is that I just didn't get to see him. So, yeah. That's it, I guess. I do miss him, though. The guy in my dreams. Yeah, I miss him. A lot.
xxx
December 25, 2012
December 18, 2012
14.12.12
Muhammad Amirul Eiman bin Azmi.
He's 15 years old and he is the guy who stole my heart. It started of when I was at the US of A. He's bestfriends with Andzar and the other kolo dudes. We started to talk on Twitter. Something happened so he mention-ed me. We talked and stuff and then he followed me, so I followed him back.
After a few days, I wrote on twitter saying I want to go and watch Breaking Dawn part 2 again but someone needs to accompany me. And he said he wants to do it. So he asked for my number, and I gave it to him. The next day, we started whatsapp-ing each other and stuff. But we fight a lot hahaha. And then after a few days of talking everyday, without me realizing, I was starting to fall for him. I'd get excited whenever he says a single "hi" to me and I would look forward to him whatsapp-ing me. But I didn't want to get my hopes too high so I tried to avoid it. I didn't want to get hurt again so I just acted as if like he was just a friend to me.
And then he told me that I was the only person to talk to him a lot. That made me happy a bit. Hehe.
And then, on the 14th of December, his cousin took his phone and told me that Eiman likes me. I didn't want to believe it so I just said things like I don't believe him and all that. After that, Eiman took his phone again. And this happened :-
Him: Why did you talk to him? :-(
Me: Haha, I was bored.
Him: I hate you
Me: I hate you too!
Him: But I can't hate you
Me: Oh, why?
Him: Because what my cousin said was kind of right..
Me: Oh....
And so he told me he liked me and I was shocked. I didn't expect that at all. And then he said, "I wonder what your feelings are towards me" and I went blank. I didn't want to tell him at all that I liked him too. I didn't want to give in to it. I didn't want to get hurt and start all over again. It was devastating. But he really wanted to know if I liked him or not, and I said yes. And then we had this really intense conversation. I felt like crying haha it was so... shocking.
Him: I promised myself I wouldn't be with anyone before marriage
Me: And I promised myself I wouldn't like anyone anymore
Him: So, you don't like me?
Me: I already broke my promise..
Him: I'm about to break mine....
And then I freaked out as fuck! I was really shocked. I couldn't stop writing "ohh wow", it was making me crazy. But it was also thrilling to me. I couldn't stop smiling. And then I told him that I hate getting hurt and I'm a very complicated person. He said he hates hurting people that he loves and he'll try to be with me. And then I said I don't know. He replied with, "Be mine" and then I said that I'm not sure and all.
Then, he started to regret confessing to me. He said he wished he didn't and blablabla and then I convinced him that it wasn't wrong. And then poof! I said yes. He said he was extremely happy and he couldn't believe it. It was also like a miracle to me. We chat on whatsapp for hours and hours until it was already 2am. And then on the next day, I woke up saying, "Oh my god.." and then said good morning to him. He was really happy about that.
He was perfect. Everything about him was just pure perfection. He's good-looking, he's very muscular because he often goes to the gym, he just learned how to play the guitar, he's a skateboarder (which kind of turns me on lol), he LIKES Twilight (omg when I knew this, I freaked out!), he's a very nice guy, he's reaaaaally sweet (He made me melt a lot like omfg I felt like fainting) and much much more.
He told me he was very happy and he couldn't believe that we're together. And then he wrote my name as "Beauty" and asked me to write his name as "Beast" which is really sweet to me. So, yeah. There it goes. Okaybye.
xxx
He's 15 years old and he is the guy who stole my heart. It started of when I was at the US of A. He's bestfriends with Andzar and the other kolo dudes. We started to talk on Twitter. Something happened so he mention-ed me. We talked and stuff and then he followed me, so I followed him back.
After a few days, I wrote on twitter saying I want to go and watch Breaking Dawn part 2 again but someone needs to accompany me. And he said he wants to do it. So he asked for my number, and I gave it to him. The next day, we started whatsapp-ing each other and stuff. But we fight a lot hahaha. And then after a few days of talking everyday, without me realizing, I was starting to fall for him. I'd get excited whenever he says a single "hi" to me and I would look forward to him whatsapp-ing me. But I didn't want to get my hopes too high so I tried to avoid it. I didn't want to get hurt again so I just acted as if like he was just a friend to me.
And then he told me that I was the only person to talk to him a lot. That made me happy a bit. Hehe.
And then, on the 14th of December, his cousin took his phone and told me that Eiman likes me. I didn't want to believe it so I just said things like I don't believe him and all that. After that, Eiman took his phone again. And this happened :-
Him: Why did you talk to him? :-(
Me: Haha, I was bored.
Him: I hate you
Me: I hate you too!
Him: But I can't hate you
Me: Oh, why?
Him: Because what my cousin said was kind of right..
Me: Oh....
And so he told me he liked me and I was shocked. I didn't expect that at all. And then he said, "I wonder what your feelings are towards me" and I went blank. I didn't want to tell him at all that I liked him too. I didn't want to give in to it. I didn't want to get hurt and start all over again. It was devastating. But he really wanted to know if I liked him or not, and I said yes. And then we had this really intense conversation. I felt like crying haha it was so... shocking.
Him: I promised myself I wouldn't be with anyone before marriage
Me: And I promised myself I wouldn't like anyone anymore
Him: So, you don't like me?
Me: I already broke my promise..
Him: I'm about to break mine....
And then I freaked out as fuck! I was really shocked. I couldn't stop writing "ohh wow", it was making me crazy. But it was also thrilling to me. I couldn't stop smiling. And then I told him that I hate getting hurt and I'm a very complicated person. He said he hates hurting people that he loves and he'll try to be with me. And then I said I don't know. He replied with, "Be mine" and then I said that I'm not sure and all.
Then, he started to regret confessing to me. He said he wished he didn't and blablabla and then I convinced him that it wasn't wrong. And then poof! I said yes. He said he was extremely happy and he couldn't believe it. It was also like a miracle to me. We chat on whatsapp for hours and hours until it was already 2am. And then on the next day, I woke up saying, "Oh my god.." and then said good morning to him. He was really happy about that.
He was perfect. Everything about him was just pure perfection. He's good-looking, he's very muscular because he often goes to the gym, he just learned how to play the guitar, he's a skateboarder (which kind of turns me on lol), he LIKES Twilight (omg when I knew this, I freaked out!), he's a very nice guy, he's reaaaaally sweet (He made me melt a lot like omfg I felt like fainting) and much much more.
He told me he was very happy and he couldn't believe that we're together. And then he wrote my name as "Beauty" and asked me to write his name as "Beast" which is really sweet to me. So, yeah. There it goes. Okaybye.
xxx
December 8, 2012
A New Chapter -2013-
2013.
Wow, so close to another year. Another chapter of our so-called, life. It's been 11 months and 8 days already. Another 3 weeks and 2 days until another year starts. A whole new year.
Well, 2012 was okay, I suppose. It was dull, it was fun and you know, just that. It's been like that every year. So, nothing new, I guess. But there is this one thing though, next year I have a really big exam. I have to study more and reduce using my phone and social networks and stuff like that. I want to go to tuition and start early but none of my friends are going to tuition plus next year, I'm moving to another place.
Oh yes, my new life at a new school, new home and new place with different people and different neighborhood. Yes, I'm moving, again. I guess I could say that I like the new place I'm gonna move to. Because the school is better compared to my current school and also I get to have my own room and stuff so yeah. I'm quite excited about that. But, I'm afraid of going to that school and being left-out and being the stranger that's lost or something. It's terrifying. I hate that.
Other than that, I'm pretty excited to go through another year with my new home and all. I get to meet new people and maybe get some new friends along the way. But I'll never forget my bestfriends here, of course.
I really hope that I'll work harder this time and get straight A's. I want to get 8As for the big exam I'm gonna have next year. Amiiin!
xxx
Wow, so close to another year. Another chapter of our so-called, life. It's been 11 months and 8 days already. Another 3 weeks and 2 days until another year starts. A whole new year.
Well, 2012 was okay, I suppose. It was dull, it was fun and you know, just that. It's been like that every year. So, nothing new, I guess. But there is this one thing though, next year I have a really big exam. I have to study more and reduce using my phone and social networks and stuff like that. I want to go to tuition and start early but none of my friends are going to tuition plus next year, I'm moving to another place.
Oh yes, my new life at a new school, new home and new place with different people and different neighborhood. Yes, I'm moving, again. I guess I could say that I like the new place I'm gonna move to. Because the school is better compared to my current school and also I get to have my own room and stuff so yeah. I'm quite excited about that. But, I'm afraid of going to that school and being left-out and being the stranger that's lost or something. It's terrifying. I hate that.
Other than that, I'm pretty excited to go through another year with my new home and all. I get to meet new people and maybe get some new friends along the way. But I'll never forget my bestfriends here, of course.
I really hope that I'll work harder this time and get straight A's. I want to get 8As for the big exam I'm gonna have next year. Amiiin!
xxx
December 5, 2012
Los Angeles, Chicago and Las Vegas
Hey there! As most of you would probably know, I went to the US of A for the school holidays. It was fun, of course. I loved it there. The people are all so nice and polite. I was surprised because I was so used to the people here, at Malaysia. They're very different compared to here. I wish I could stay there forever :-( Oh well....
Los Angeles
On the first day, I went to LA and stayed at a hotel called, Anabella Hotel. The hotel is a 10 minute walk away from Disneyland. Yeah, pretty close but you'd still feel tired if you walked all the way but yeah it'll be worth it. I arrived there at nighttime so my parents and I rested for the day. I watched the television and found out that Breaking Dawn was premiered at LA too. I was so shocked that I screamed haha and I wanted my parents to bring me there but they didn't want to. Yeah, sad me is sad. Later on, we walked at the street and had dinner at a diner. The diner was so cool and I loved their pies!
On the next day, we went to Disneyland. My parents and I rode some rides and stuff. It was fun but it would be more fun if I had a friend to accompany me because my mom is afraid of most of the fun rides and I feel sorry for my dad because he had to ride all the rides for me.
We went there at 10am, had lunch inside and got back to the hotel at 9pm.
On the next day, we went to Disneyland again but at a different park. The California Adventures, they call it. But on that day, we went back to the hotel a little bit early because my parents were tired. See? :-( Hmm. But I had fun anyway so I feel happy for that, yes.
Saint Louis, Chicago
After staying at LA for three days, I went to St. Louis. I visited my aunt & uncle and their children, Shawn, Samantha and Saria. They took us to a lot of interesting places and we went to a lot of outlet malls and retail shops. We also went to stay at the Lake of Ozark plus we went to the Botanical Garden and looked at a lot of beautiful flowers but most of them are already dead but yeah it was still fun, haha. We also went to go and watch Saria play soccer and I met some of her friends there too. I met Shelby and Millie. All of them were so pretty! I felt so freaking insecure.
I stayed at their house for 1 week plus a few days. It was fun spending time with them. My aunt and uncle bought a lot of cookies for me so I felt like heaven at that time hehe. And, they celebrated thanksgiving with their relatives so my parents and I just ate the turkey and pies and some other very very VERY delicious food haha ok now I'm craving for all of it. And then, Saria, Samantha, their cousin and I played some games. I met a lot of their relatives that day. I was really shy so I didn't say anything and I just ate all the food hahaha.
At the Lake of Ozark, there is an outlet mall with a lot of branded stores but they're now out-of-style so the price are all very cheap! But to us, we don't care because it's cheap so we just buy it. I bought 3 long-sleeve shirts at Nike, a pair of pink with purple base jogging shoes and a sports bra at Adidas, 2 slim colored jeans and 3 Breaking Dawn t-shirts (Yes, I screamed at the store when I found it) at RUE21, and an Adventure Time t-shirt and a pair of jeans at a store which I forgot what it's called. Yup, I went crazy at that time.
On the 18th of Nov, we were all at the outlet mall. We watched Breaking Dawn (Part 2) there. It was awesome, yes.
Las Vegas
We all stayed at Vegas for a few days. We stayed at a hotel called, Stratosphere. It's a very tall hotel. It kind of looks like the KL Tower. So, on the first day, my parents and I went to watch The Donny and Marie show. They were really famous when they were young. My mom loves them a lot haha. After that, my aunt, my uncle and Saria just arrived Vegas. We all walked on the strip. It was a very long walk but gosh, it was really worth it! The whole strip was so pretty with all the different type of shapes and colors of the buildings and all. I took a photo with The Joker, Elmo, Spongebob and Bumblebee. Of course, you have to pay them. And then we all went back to the hotel.
The next day, we had our breakfast at IHOP. Which stands for International House Of Pancakes. Seriously, I felt like heaven with all the pancakes on the menu! Gosh haha okay I'm sound so hungry now. So anyway, and then we walked to some places and stuff. At night, we went to a circus called, Circus Circus. (Obvious ey? lol) We had a lot of fun at the circus! We played some games and I won 2 prizes, a penguin and a puppy plushie! And then Saria and I played Guitar Hero at the arcade.
Los Angeles (again)
After staying at Vegas for a few days, my parents and I went back to LA while my aunt, uncle and Saria went back to their home at St. Louis. My parents and I took a grand tour of Downtown LA, Hollywood, the Venice beach and some other places. It was okay, I guess. My favorite was going to Hollywood because I got to see the Hollywood sign and also I got to see Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner's hand and feet prints!
After two days of staying at LA, my parents and I went to the airport and back home. It was sad to leave. I didn't want to leave at all. We stayed there for 3 weeks so I kinda felt used to staying there already. I wish I could stay there forever. And the fact that Kristen and Robert was always there also made me frustrated haha so anyway, that's all. Bye.
One day, I'm gonna stay there. Either with my bestfriend, Tasnim or a guy that I really love. Yes, I will stay there. No matter what happens, it'll happen for sure.
With love, Madihah.
December 2, 2012
Twilight: Breaking Dawn (Part II)
I've loved Twilight since day one. I bought the books and read all of them. I even bought 3 t-shirts of it when I went to Chicago last week. Yeah haha I went there. I'll update later. So anyway, on the same day I bought the t-shirts, I watched the Breaking Dawn - Part 2 movie. Yeah, the last movie. (I hope not) Yes of course, it was awesome. The twist at the end was very shocking and I was so speechless because I didn't expect it to happen at all. I don't want to be a spoiler so yeah I'll just keep quiet, haha.
I totally recommend you guys to watch it! I mean like, on the first day it premiered, it sold out! It's crazy. Oh and I don't care that you're a hater or you dislike it or wtvr but seriously you should really watch it. You'd be surprised too. But if you're a complainer-which I know you are-then don't waste your time. But if you're interested, you should watch it. Don't be a complainer, okay? :)
And another crazy thing is that when the movie premiered at Los Angeles, I was at LA too. Yeah, I screamed when I found out. But it was already too late because my parents were tired and they were too lazy to bring me there. I was very sad, of course.
I watched the movie with my parents, my aunt and my cousin. We all liked it. But the ending was sad, though. Really sad. And also sad because it's the very last one. I really wish that they'd make another one but I doubt that that'll happen. Almost impossible, I guess. So yeah, I love Twilight. Nothing can make me change my mind.
Don't forget to watch the movie! Oh and don't forget to bring me too hehe
xxx
With love, Madihah.
(A Twihard)
November 2, 2012
Free as a prisoner
I feel so free now. Why? Because I've just finished my final exam! It was quite okay. I was a bit stressed with it but I kept calm and hoped for the best. Truth be told, it was actually fun! Because everyone's like studying and all, being stressed out together and working together so that all of us doesn't fail haha
But there's this one really sad thing happened yesterday. The teacher gave the history paper to everyone and, you know what? I failed. Yeah, I failed my history test. By only two marks. I felt reaaaally sad. I felt like crying but I just acted normal. My friends passed the test but I failed. I am a failure. I don't know how am I going to tell my parents about it. So, yeah next year I'll go down one class because of one fail. Damn
Today, I got my science paper and I got 77! I felt relieved for that. Phew! Oh and mathematics paper was quite easy. That was the first time that I felt like that. I hope I'll get an A for it. Or even a B+ that'd be nice.
English was easy, Malay Language was okay. The others, well I don't know, okay I guess?
Now, I can go anywhere with my friends and all. Or so I thought.. But in reality, I'll just stay at home, being bored, watch tv, sleep, play the computer and yeah, just that. It's so boring and I want to go out but my friends are all busy and my cousins live a billion miles away so yeah, I'm gonna waste my holiday with being bored.
On the exam week, I'd have something to do. I'd have to study non-stop, making notes and all that. But now, I have nothing to do. I don't know what to do to make me occupied. It's. just. so. boring. And now I have nothing else to say so bye!
Madihah.
But there's this one really sad thing happened yesterday. The teacher gave the history paper to everyone and, you know what? I failed. Yeah, I failed my history test. By only two marks. I felt reaaaally sad. I felt like crying but I just acted normal. My friends passed the test but I failed. I am a failure. I don't know how am I going to tell my parents about it. So, yeah next year I'll go down one class because of one fail. Damn
Today, I got my science paper and I got 77! I felt relieved for that. Phew! Oh and mathematics paper was quite easy. That was the first time that I felt like that. I hope I'll get an A for it. Or even a B+ that'd be nice.
English was easy, Malay Language was okay. The others, well I don't know, okay I guess?
Now, I can go anywhere with my friends and all. Or so I thought.. But in reality, I'll just stay at home, being bored, watch tv, sleep, play the computer and yeah, just that. It's so boring and I want to go out but my friends are all busy and my cousins live a billion miles away so yeah, I'm gonna waste my holiday with being bored.
On the exam week, I'd have something to do. I'd have to study non-stop, making notes and all that. But now, I have nothing to do. I don't know what to do to make me occupied. It's. just. so. boring. And now I have nothing else to say so bye!
Madihah.
Speechless
To tell you the truth, the title has nothing to do with what I'm going to write here. It's titled speechless because I don't know what to name the title. Hahahaha k
So this is a story about a girl and a guy who-shall-not-be-named who goes to the same school. They knew each other from Twitter, but they didn't talk/mention and etc. until a few months after that. But the girl had a boyfriend at that time so she didn't want to get too close to other guys.
On one fine day, it was the month of August. The girl's relationship was going downhill and soon, she and her boyfriend broke up. She reconnected with the guy who-shall-not-be-named and they became close. The guy would always mention her on twitter and say hi or whatever.
The next day, the girl and her siblings went to bazaar Ramadhan to buy some food for breaking fast. They walked, walked and walked. The girl saw the guy at one of the stalls. The guy was selling Roti John with his other friends. They walked by the guy's stall. As they were walking, the guy said loudly, "Roti John! Roti John! __(girl's name)__, Roti John!". The girl was shy and scared because of her siblings so she just looked down and laughed a little. The guy just smiled at the girl, showing no shyness at all towards her siblings. The girl was relieved because her siblings acted cool.
At school, when the last bell rang, the girl and her friends went to the front of the school. The guy and his friends were there too. The guy came to her, really close and asked, "Where's my biscuits?" while smiling. The girl, being shy as ever, just mumbled and said things like, "*laugh* I don't have any haaaaa...." and then there was awkward silence where the girl and guy had nothing to say. So the guys just left her and went to his friends.
And so they were still pretty close for a few months. They whatsapp-ed each other and whatnot.
But then, all of the sudden, the guy didn't say "hi" to her at all. He instantly became a stranger to the girl. And the guy was okay with it. Showing no care or anything towards it. The girl wasn't really sad about it because the girl had expected it to happen.
The girl got used to being ignored and all so she just lived her life, without him. It's not a sad story but it just shows that even the person you're really close to, can even leave you in the end.
Like everyone else, he left the girl too.
And now, the girl has to deal with it, alone.
xoxo, Madihah.
So this is a story about a girl and a guy who-shall-not-be-named who goes to the same school. They knew each other from Twitter, but they didn't talk/mention and etc. until a few months after that. But the girl had a boyfriend at that time so she didn't want to get too close to other guys.
On one fine day, it was the month of August. The girl's relationship was going downhill and soon, she and her boyfriend broke up. She reconnected with the guy who-shall-not-be-named and they became close. The guy would always mention her on twitter and say hi or whatever.
The next day, the girl and her siblings went to bazaar Ramadhan to buy some food for breaking fast. They walked, walked and walked. The girl saw the guy at one of the stalls. The guy was selling Roti John with his other friends. They walked by the guy's stall. As they were walking, the guy said loudly, "Roti John! Roti John! __(girl's name)__, Roti John!". The girl was shy and scared because of her siblings so she just looked down and laughed a little. The guy just smiled at the girl, showing no shyness at all towards her siblings. The girl was relieved because her siblings acted cool.
At school, when the last bell rang, the girl and her friends went to the front of the school. The guy and his friends were there too. The guy came to her, really close and asked, "Where's my biscuits?" while smiling. The girl, being shy as ever, just mumbled and said things like, "*laugh* I don't have any haaaaa...." and then there was awkward silence where the girl and guy had nothing to say. So the guys just left her and went to his friends.
And so they were still pretty close for a few months. They whatsapp-ed each other and whatnot.
But then, all of the sudden, the guy didn't say "hi" to her at all. He instantly became a stranger to the girl. And the guy was okay with it. Showing no care or anything towards it. The girl wasn't really sad about it because the girl had expected it to happen.
The girl got used to being ignored and all so she just lived her life, without him. It's not a sad story but it just shows that even the person you're really close to, can even leave you in the end.
Like everyone else, he left the girl too.
And now, the girl has to deal with it, alone.
xoxo, Madihah.
November 1, 2012
Strangers
Strangers.
Yes, strangers. But not those kind of strangers, I mean the strangers that we were once so close but all of the sudden, it all just, stops. You don’t talk to them anymore, they don’t even show any effort to say a simple “hi” to you and yeah, everything just, stops.
I’ve been in that situation a bunch of times. It really hurts. It makes me don’t want to get close to anyone anymore. It makes me scared. I hate it when someone leaves me. I just hate it. I even feel like punching those people. If I had known that they’d leave me in the end, I wouldn’t even talk to them. I would’ve just ignored them. To save myself, of course.
Well, I got used to all of this. It’s not a new thing to me now. It’s just one of those phases where you HAVE to ignore everyone in order to make them realize that I’m actually important to them. But I doubt that’ll ever happen so, whatever.
In conclusion of it all, never, I repeat, never, leave someone hanging and making them all look stupid. And if you do it anyway, don’t come back to that person out of the blue and by just saying “I’m sorry”. Why? Because it doesn’t work that way.
If you were in their shoes, you’d know how they felt.
Yes, strangers. But not those kind of strangers, I mean the strangers that we were once so close but all of the sudden, it all just, stops. You don’t talk to them anymore, they don’t even show any effort to say a simple “hi” to you and yeah, everything just, stops.
I’ve been in that situation a bunch of times. It really hurts. It makes me don’t want to get close to anyone anymore. It makes me scared. I hate it when someone leaves me. I just hate it. I even feel like punching those people. If I had known that they’d leave me in the end, I wouldn’t even talk to them. I would’ve just ignored them. To save myself, of course.
Well, I got used to all of this. It’s not a new thing to me now. It’s just one of those phases where you HAVE to ignore everyone in order to make them realize that I’m actually important to them. But I doubt that’ll ever happen so, whatever.
In conclusion of it all, never, I repeat, never, leave someone hanging and making them all look stupid. And if you do it anyway, don’t come back to that person out of the blue and by just saying “I’m sorry”. Why? Because it doesn’t work that way.
If you were in their shoes, you’d know how they felt.
September 26, 2012
Bestfriends
The people who stick with you through thick and thin (Other than your family, of course)
Some people have only one bestfriend, some have many. Well for me, I don't have a lot of bestfriends but they are enough to make me happy when I'm sad. My bestfriends are Tasnim (my cousin), Puteri, Sabrina, Alisya and Hanis.
We all have bestfriends and also ex-bestfriends. I have both. Well, they become my "ex-bestfriends" because we didn't talk for a long time and they all got the wrong idea of me hating them and etc etc. But we got our stories straight and said sorry but we didn't get back together. I don't really know why but I do miss them though. I really hope that one day, my ex-bestfriends and my current bestfriends would all be bestfriends, in the future. That'd be nice.
I tell almost everything to my bestfriends. They are my diary, my sisters and my family. I can't imagine how I would live if I hadn't met them. We do almost everything together. If someone can't do it, none of us will. We stick together and rarely fight. If we did, it would only last for a few minutes and we'd get back together, make jokes and laugh together again. We help each other and sometimes, cut class together haha lol no I'm just joking (maybe) hehehe
I'm glad I got to know them. I love them all so much! I really hope we'd stay together, forever. InsyaAllah...
With love, Madihah.
School and some other stuff
Hi there! Haven't updated about school for awhile. So yeah, here it goes!
I got up at 6am and got ready. Went to school and arrived at 7.20am. Talked with Puteri, Sabrina and Alisya. Got into class and learnt some stuff lol I don't even remember. Then, it was Life Skills subject, we had to go to the life skills class. Puteri and I got down the stairs while Alisya and Sabrina was behind us. As we got down, we went the other way to the stairs beside it cause we saw cikgu Azman. Puteri and I laughed cause we were shocked lol. As we were walking, I saw Danial Ariffin and his friends right beside us. I walked right beside them quickly till I almost ran haha I was shy and I don't even know why. Then, Puteri and I was in front of them. Puteri and I still laughed like a lot haha then one of Danial's friend teased Puteri haha. We walked quickly to the class and got in straightaway.
Sabrina and I would always catch Danial looking at us. Sometimes when I'm sitting alone in my class, I would see him and his friend walk by my class. And then Danial would look at me, but when I look at him, he'd look somewhere else. Funny...
So yeah, bye x
I got up at 6am and got ready. Went to school and arrived at 7.20am. Talked with Puteri, Sabrina and Alisya. Got into class and learnt some stuff lol I don't even remember. Then, it was Life Skills subject, we had to go to the life skills class. Puteri and I got down the stairs while Alisya and Sabrina was behind us. As we got down, we went the other way to the stairs beside it cause we saw cikgu Azman. Puteri and I laughed cause we were shocked lol. As we were walking, I saw Danial Ariffin and his friends right beside us. I walked right beside them quickly till I almost ran haha I was shy and I don't even know why. Then, Puteri and I was in front of them. Puteri and I still laughed like a lot haha then one of Danial's friend teased Puteri haha. We walked quickly to the class and got in straightaway.
Sabrina and I would always catch Danial looking at us. Sometimes when I'm sitting alone in my class, I would see him and his friend walk by my class. And then Danial would look at me, but when I look at him, he'd look somewhere else. Funny...
So yeah, bye x
September 23, 2012
Pavilion with Tasnim
Last week, I went to Pavilion with my cousin, Tasnim. She's the same age as me, but she stays at Bangi. So anyway, we hung out at Pavilion, just the two of us, for the first time haha.
We arrived there around 11.30am. There weren't many people there at that day. We went to the cinema first to buy tickets. We wanted to watch "The Watch" hahaha yeah "watch the watch" hahaha ok continue
We were afraid to watch that movie cause it's 18+ but we bought it anyway lol the movie wasn't THAT bad at all. Sheesh. So after we both bought the tickets, we had 15 minutes to go around Pavilion so yeah we did. Went to Gardian, Speedy and bought some albums. After that, we went back to the cinema to watch the movie. When we arrived there, our hearts were pounding like hell! We were so scared haha but we cover line lah.
We gave the worker the tickets and yay! we got in. We ran up the stairs cause we were terrified lol. The cinema weren't full as usual so we just sit there and watched the movie. The movie was awesome! We loved the movie cause it was a comedy and we wanted to watch something that's funny and that movie was perfect! Later on, we roamed around again and then went to the food court cause we were hungry. We both ordered Beef Dolsot Bibimbap from the korean stall. It was freaking delicious man! I totally recommend you people to taste that thanggg
While we were eating, we talked about some stuff and Tasnim spazzed because there were a lot of korean people around us haha. Pavilion is usually fulled with american people but I don't know why for some reason at that time, korean people were all around there haha. Tasnim got lucky I guess x)
After we finished eating, we went to the Famous Amos cookies stall cause I'm obsessed with cookies, yes. Hehe.
And then we walked all around Pavilion and bought some stuff and then at 5pm, we went home. So, yeah, there it goes! Haha bye
xxx
Madihah.
We arrived there around 11.30am. There weren't many people there at that day. We went to the cinema first to buy tickets. We wanted to watch "The Watch" hahaha yeah "watch the watch" hahaha ok continue
We were afraid to watch that movie cause it's 18+ but we bought it anyway lol the movie wasn't THAT bad at all. Sheesh. So after we both bought the tickets, we had 15 minutes to go around Pavilion so yeah we did. Went to Gardian, Speedy and bought some albums. After that, we went back to the cinema to watch the movie. When we arrived there, our hearts were pounding like hell! We were so scared haha but we cover line lah.
We gave the worker the tickets and yay! we got in. We ran up the stairs cause we were terrified lol. The cinema weren't full as usual so we just sit there and watched the movie. The movie was awesome! We loved the movie cause it was a comedy and we wanted to watch something that's funny and that movie was perfect! Later on, we roamed around again and then went to the food court cause we were hungry. We both ordered Beef Dolsot Bibimbap from the korean stall. It was freaking delicious man! I totally recommend you people to taste that thanggg
While we were eating, we talked about some stuff and Tasnim spazzed because there were a lot of korean people around us haha. Pavilion is usually fulled with american people but I don't know why for some reason at that time, korean people were all around there haha. Tasnim got lucky I guess x)
After we finished eating, we went to the Famous Amos cookies stall cause I'm obsessed with cookies, yes. Hehe.
And then we walked all around Pavilion and bought some stuff and then at 5pm, we went home. So, yeah, there it goes! Haha bye
xxx
Madihah.
September 14, 2012
Alone.
Hey there! Now I'm at home, alone. My mom is at Kota Bharu, my dad is working, my sister is at the hospital, my brother is somewhere... I don't know where lol.
So freaking bored right now. I don't know what to do except online, watch tv, blogging and other stuff. And I'm starting to play club penguin again. Oh it's some type of online chatting game like gaiaonline, migoland, zwinky, habbo and etc. It's quite fun though even though I have grown up.
I've been good, I guess. A little bit okay/fine or whatever. Well sometimes I do feel emo and lonely. But that's just something that I have to deal with and get over with/move on and such. I have to accept the fact that it's over even if I didn't even want it to. So, yeah. Bye.
xoxo, Madihah.
So freaking bored right now. I don't know what to do except online, watch tv, blogging and other stuff. And I'm starting to play club penguin again. Oh it's some type of online chatting game like gaiaonline, migoland, zwinky, habbo and etc. It's quite fun though even though I have grown up.
I've been good, I guess. A little bit okay/fine or whatever. Well sometimes I do feel emo and lonely. But that's just something that I have to deal with and get over with/move on and such. I have to accept the fact that it's over even if I didn't even want it to. So, yeah. Bye.
xoxo, Madihah.
September 11, 2012
Over. For good. Or bad? I don't know.
I can't believe it happened again. I mean, I really thought that we'd be together forever as how you would always say. I'm still in shock and it probably would never end.
I still love you I fcking hate you right now. And also that girl. I feel like throwing a really big chair at you both and cutting off your legs because... Yeah whatever.
It ended on Monday, 23rd of July.
I can't believe that you did that to me. Cheating on me. Like, WHAT? *sigh*
You gave a lot of excuses for doing it, and then say that you don't want to leave me. But, it was already too late. You should've thought twice. Or even, thrice. Or more. I feel betrayed. Betrayed by him. His friends. And some other people. They know and they saw, but they never said anything. I mean, I was nice to them for god's sake! And they betrayed me. He betrayed me. That stupid btch betrayed me. I seriously wish that I could go to your school and just look at you and ask, why?
I loved you. A lot. Even though you did a lot of things that made me mad and ignore you, I still loved you. I know that you loved me too. But you were just too stupid to handle it in a right way. It was like you had a 'backup plan' for whenever I ignore you. You had someone to talk to when I wasn't there. So, you didn't really care. Yes, I know. And, I know that you know that I wanted to break up even before I knew the truth. I almost did it. But, I didn't do it for a good reason. I didn't do it because I still loved you. So much. And it hurts to know that you never really cared at the first place.
You expect me to give you another chance? No, never. You disappointed me. I've been giving out chances and all you ever do is let me down. Now, I see you talking to other girls like it was nothing, and also your twitcon.. wow. Just, wow. And yeah, I was right. I was right all along.
I miss the times when you told me that you like me. At that time, I was the center of attention. Of your attention. You didn't talk to other girls, but me. You really really liked me at that time. I miss that. And the time when you tried really hard to make me like you back. You'd text me everyday, all day, non-stop. Those three months of you liking me were amazing.
"Hope you're happy without me." you said, on my birthday, last month.
I'm not really sure what you mean by that but yeah, I hope the same for you. (maybe)
"I miss you." you said, on the first day of Hari Raya Aidilfitri.
At that time, you made me confused. Like a lot. But I just acted as if it was nothing and just replied your whatsapp.
Well, I can't do anything about it now. It hurts though. It still hurts. A lot. And I miss you. So much. Thanks for everything. Bye x
With love, Madihah.
September 5, 2012
Choral speaking
Hi, there! I haven't updated my blog in a while. I miss blogging hihi
So anyway, I got involved in choral speaking (For the first time!) for my school's Hari Alam Sekitar. It was quite fun but also exhausting. My classmates and I would stay back after school to practise, practise and practise.
At first, we were awful. Reaaaally awful. We wouldn't synchronise and our voices would be slow and terabur gila. It was just terrible and our conducter would scold us a lot of times.
After a lot of practising, we got better and better. Our conducter was quite satisfied with that. Our actions were synchronised, our voices were loud and our conducter complimented us saying, "IT WAS AWESOME!" well that was before we had to perform in front of the whole school.
On Monday, we came early to practise some more. Some people forgot the actions and stuff but it was okay cause they remembered again. Before we went on the stage, we had to wait at the back. We were all nervous cause we were scared that we'd do something wrong and mess up the whole thing. Sabrina and I was shivering and jumping all around the place! It was terrifiying, really. We were also nervous because we've never performed on stage before. Let alone stand on it in front of the whole fudging school.
"Kami mempersembahkan, kelas 2 Cemerlang bagi merasmikan Hari Alam Sekitar ini!" was our queue. We were like, "omg omg!" haha. We went on stage and Sabrina and I can't stop smiling. All the guys are right in front of us and it was really embarrassing! Danial was also in front of us and we didn't even look at him haha.
It was really nerve-wrecking to perform on stage. Especially when someone made a mistake...
Yup, someone made a mistake. He accodently said a sentence that wasn't supposed to be said. A lot of the guys laughed. The guys laughed a lot of times. It wasn't even that funny. Gosh..
Sabrina and I got really angry at the guys that laughed at us. But we went on like nothing happened. We worked our butts off but it was awful! Some people were slow and sometimes they'd forget their actions. It was embarrassing and disappointing.
After we were done, all of the sudden, everyone cheered for us. But we were still not satisfied with the people who laughed at us. We got off the stage and went to take our bags at the back. Sabrina and I went to the canteen and everyone looked at us, weirdly. Sabrina and I felt paranoid so we ran right pass through the canteen.
All of us got the certificate for entering the choral speaking thing but it was still embarrassing. Oh well, can't do anything about it.
I'm never gonna do that ever again.
So anyway, I got involved in choral speaking (For the first time!) for my school's Hari Alam Sekitar. It was quite fun but also exhausting. My classmates and I would stay back after school to practise, practise and practise.
At first, we were awful. Reaaaally awful. We wouldn't synchronise and our voices would be slow and terabur gila. It was just terrible and our conducter would scold us a lot of times.
After a lot of practising, we got better and better. Our conducter was quite satisfied with that. Our actions were synchronised, our voices were loud and our conducter complimented us saying, "IT WAS AWESOME!" well that was before we had to perform in front of the whole school.
On Monday, we came early to practise some more. Some people forgot the actions and stuff but it was okay cause they remembered again. Before we went on the stage, we had to wait at the back. We were all nervous cause we were scared that we'd do something wrong and mess up the whole thing. Sabrina and I was shivering and jumping all around the place! It was terrifiying, really. We were also nervous because we've never performed on stage before. Let alone stand on it in front of the whole fudging school.
"Kami mempersembahkan, kelas 2 Cemerlang bagi merasmikan Hari Alam Sekitar ini!" was our queue. We were like, "omg omg!" haha. We went on stage and Sabrina and I can't stop smiling. All the guys are right in front of us and it was really embarrassing! Danial was also in front of us and we didn't even look at him haha.
It was really nerve-wrecking to perform on stage. Especially when someone made a mistake...
Yup, someone made a mistake. He accodently said a sentence that wasn't supposed to be said. A lot of the guys laughed. The guys laughed a lot of times. It wasn't even that funny. Gosh..
Sabrina and I got really angry at the guys that laughed at us. But we went on like nothing happened. We worked our butts off but it was awful! Some people were slow and sometimes they'd forget their actions. It was embarrassing and disappointing.
After we were done, all of the sudden, everyone cheered for us. But we were still not satisfied with the people who laughed at us. We got off the stage and went to take our bags at the back. Sabrina and I went to the canteen and everyone looked at us, weirdly. Sabrina and I felt paranoid so we ran right pass through the canteen.
All of us got the certificate for entering the choral speaking thing but it was still embarrassing. Oh well, can't do anything about it.
I'm never gonna do that ever again.
Hugs & kisses, Madihah.
March 29, 2012
One of those sweet memories
Hi there. Well, Andzar is back from Umrah. Yay! I was so happy. He called me as soon as he got to the airport. Aww, how sweet of him :') Here's the convo:-
Me: *smiling* Hello
Him: Hello! *smiling* Dah sampai airport dah ni
Me: Ohh okay. Err, tengah makan ni
Him: Oh yeke? Okayokay sorry!
Me: Haa okay, bye
Him: Bye
Eventhough it was a short conversation, i was so happy. I felt like jumping at that time. Both of us sounded like we wanted to laugh cause we were both shy. Haha. How cute. I knew he was smiling by the way he spoke, and he knew that i was shy cause i wanted to laugh. And his voice was so..... ohmygod. Seriously. Everytime i thought back about our first on-the-phone conversation, and remembered how his voice sounded like, i felt like i could faint. Weird... haha
But unfortunately, we couldn't talk long cause i was eating. How sad :-( Oh well. I hope he'll call me again. By surprise or whatever. I do hope so.
Soyeah, that's all. Byebye!
xxx
______________________________________________________________________________
24/7/2012 And he never called..
Me: *smiling* Hello
Him: Hello! *smiling* Dah sampai airport dah ni
Me: Ohh okay. Err, tengah makan ni
Him: Oh yeke? Okayokay sorry!
Me: Haa okay, bye
Him: Bye
Eventhough it was a short conversation, i was so happy. I felt like jumping at that time. Both of us sounded like we wanted to laugh cause we were both shy. Haha. How cute. I knew he was smiling by the way he spoke, and he knew that i was shy cause i wanted to laugh. And his voice was so..... ohmygod. Seriously. Everytime i thought back about our first on-the-phone conversation, and remembered how his voice sounded like, i felt like i could faint. Weird... haha
But unfortunately, we couldn't talk long cause i was eating. How sad :-( Oh well. I hope he'll call me again. By surprise or whatever. I do hope so.
Soyeah, that's all. Byebye!
xxx
______________________________________________________________________________
24/7/2012 And he never called..
Me. Just, me.
Hey. In this entry, i would like to tell you about myself. Well, here it goes!
1. I like to draw. Anything. Yes, i have the ability to draw. lol k.
2. I like to eat macarons, cupcakes, chocolates, cookies, ice cream and much more
3. I like photography. I have a Nikon D3100 and i like to take artsy photos.
4. I want an iPhone 4S
5. I want to travel all around the world with the people i love
6. I want a polaroid
7. I want a Nikon 1
8. I'm sometimes hyper
9. I'm lame
10. I get emotional for little things and i dunno why
11. I can be random at times
12. I can be loud
13. When i know someone likes me, i dunno what to do and i'll feel awkward
14. I'm sometimes shy with people i don't really know
15. I love my loved ones dearly eventhough i don't really show it
16. I like to jump when i'm hyper
17. I sulk a lot
18. I cry alone and all by myself/no one knows i cry
19. I hate haters. Ironic, huh?
20. I hate people who stab my back
21. I'm weird
22. I'm awesome
23. I can be crazy sometimes
24. I'm annoying
25. I love people who can deal with my annoyingness cause i feel appreciated
26. You say bad things about me, i'll just sit back and wait for karma to get you
27. Religion: Islam. Forever, Islam.
28. Proud Malaysian
29. I can speak fluent english but it'll be broken when i'm nervous
30. When i'm nervous, i have stomach ache
31. I laugh a lot at things that are weird
32. I've had pets, but they all died. DIED.
33. I get jealous easily
34. I'm always insecure around really gorgeous girls
35. If you're nice to me, i'm nice to you. If you're not, then gtfo.
36. I have the tendency to laugh when people are serious
37. Sometimes i like to be alone, sometimes i want to be around people
38. I like making people happy/laugh/smile/etc
39. I like giving advices to people. But when it comes to me, i don't know what to do.
40. I like to cry. Cause it makes me feel better. But the situation never really changes, though.
41. I like good morning/good night texts cause it'll make me feel important
42. I like it when people pay attention and remember when i say/tell them something
43. I like people who likes me
44. Sometimes, i love my life.
45. Sometimes, i hate my life.
46. I like penguins.
47. I love music
48. I love technology
49. I like to write in english
50. I want to get straight As in every subject for every exam
51. I hate people who likes to interrupt me when i'm talking
52. I hate people who doesn't appreciate people in their life
53. I have a boyfriend.
54. I love my boyfriend.
55. I want to marry him, someday.
Well, there goes me!
Thanks for reading, Madihah. xxx
1. I like to draw. Anything. Yes, i have the ability to draw. lol k.
2. I like to eat macarons, cupcakes, chocolates, cookies, ice cream and much more
3. I like photography. I have a Nikon D3100 and i like to take artsy photos.
4. I want an iPhone 4S
5. I want to travel all around the world with the people i love
6. I want a polaroid
7. I want a Nikon 1
8. I'm sometimes hyper
9. I'm lame
10. I get emotional for little things and i dunno why
11. I can be random at times
12. I can be loud
13. When i know someone likes me, i dunno what to do and i'll feel awkward
14. I'm sometimes shy with people i don't really know
15. I love my loved ones dearly eventhough i don't really show it
16. I like to jump when i'm hyper
17. I sulk a lot
18. I cry alone and all by myself/no one knows i cry
19. I hate haters. Ironic, huh?
20. I hate people who stab my back
21. I'm weird
22. I'm awesome
23. I can be crazy sometimes
24. I'm annoying
25. I love people who can deal with my annoyingness cause i feel appreciated
26. You say bad things about me, i'll just sit back and wait for karma to get you
27. Religion: Islam. Forever, Islam.
28. Proud Malaysian
29. I can speak fluent english but it'll be broken when i'm nervous
30. When i'm nervous, i have stomach ache
31. I laugh a lot at things that are weird
32. I've had pets, but they all died. DIED.
33. I get jealous easily
34. I'm always insecure around really gorgeous girls
35. If you're nice to me, i'm nice to you. If you're not, then gtfo.
36. I have the tendency to laugh when people are serious
37. Sometimes i like to be alone, sometimes i want to be around people
38. I like making people happy/laugh/smile/etc
39. I like giving advices to people. But when it comes to me, i don't know what to do.
40. I like to cry. Cause it makes me feel better. But the situation never really changes, though.
41. I like good morning/good night texts cause it'll make me feel important
42. I like it when people pay attention and remember when i say/tell them something
43. I like people who likes me
44. Sometimes, i love my life.
45. Sometimes, i hate my life.
46. I like penguins.
47. I love music
48. I love technology
49. I like to write in english
50. I want to get straight As in every subject for every exam
51. I hate people who likes to interrupt me when i'm talking
52. I hate people who doesn't appreciate people in their life
53. I have a boyfriend.
54. I love my boyfriend.
55. I want to marry him, someday.
Well, there goes me!
Thanks for reading, Madihah. xxx
February 21, 2012
Again and again
Hey there! Haven't blogged for awhile. Was busy with some stuff. Yes, i'm fine :)
So anyway, i'm currently sulking with Andzar. Again. Well, he kind of 'used' me just to make his ex jealous by tweeting with me cause he knows his ex will see it. I dunno why. I don't really care, i just feel like i'm being used. And then, after that he was like jokingly-fighting with a form 1 girl on Twitter.
Well, it kinda bothers me cause he looks as if he reaaaally cares if he fought with another girl. Well, you know, when they have a bf/gf, they shouldn't be like that. They should only care for their bf/gf. So that the bf/gf would feel special and stuff like that. Yeah, it's just..... yeah.
I've been sulking since yesterday, before i went for tuition. I wanted to be 'okay' with him again, but i feel so.... sad. I can't even...... ergh.
Well, he whatsapped me, kept on saying that he thinks i don't love him anymore. I still love him. That's why i feel like this. If i don't love him anymore, i would've just left him. But yeah, i have to keep treating him this way. I'm forced to be this way. He has know, how hurt i am. How sad i am. How..... pathetic i am.
Yes, maybe, just maybe, he didn't do anything that bad. I know, i know. But, i can't change the way i feel. The way i feel inside me. I just have to hope for the best.
Thanks for reading! With love, Madihah.
February 1, 2012
Page 32 of 366
Hi there :) How's it going? I've been good. I think. So, we have reached the month of February. January has ended. And everything is going quite well. Alhamdulillah.
So, school is okay. It's okay cause a lot of teachers didn't come. Haha lol.
So, school is okay. It's okay cause a lot of teachers didn't come. Haha lol.
Well, Andzar and i have been okay :) Today is our 1 month anniversary :') Hihi, i'm quite happy with us. Well yeah, quite. Something liddat, i guess. K whatever.
Yesterday, i thought about something. In english subject, i had to tell my teacher what my career path is. As i was writing what i see myself going to be when i grow up, i had a lot of choices. Before this, i had only one and i was never really sure of being that. My mind thought about being a fashion designer, architect, photographer and maybe a painter. Or maybe i can be all those things at the same time. Haha, how funny.
Bytheway, i owe someone RM5. Haha. It's been weeks since i wanted to give him the money. But i never got a chance to give it to him. I'm shy. Like REALLY, shy. Everyday i tried giving it to him. And whenever i walk beside him or walk along his class, he'd say hi to me and his friends would tease us. And, i think the teasing might've been the cause of me being shy to give him the money. Well, i can try giving it to him tomorrow. I'll try.
I'm getting off topic now. Haha. I don't know why i always do that. So anyway, Hello February. Goodbye January. I'll miss you :')
January 25, 2012
Words do bring me down
People assume bad things about me. Always. Sometimes i feel bad about myself. Because of them...
Hi. My name is Madihah. I've cried a lot. I laugh at times. I put a smile on my face everyday and go through life and try to survive it. Yes, that's me. Always have been me. Yup, me.
People say bad things about me. Stab my back and stuff like that. I act as if it was normal to me. Yes, it is normal. I try not to care too much. But yeah, of course it hurts. People judging but they don't know you at all. Yeah, everyone seems to be like that right now. I'm not surprised though. But it hurts. It hurts a lot. You can't even imagine.
Well, as for me, i'm not the type of person who can deal with it. I'll be pissed, of course. And i'll be sad. I'd probably blog about it. And talk about it often. It's sad, really. Sad people are just, sad. So... sad. Sad enough to make me want to slap them, ya know? Ha ha ha.
I'm one of those weak people who can't deal with anyone saying bad things about myself. I have low self esteem issues. And it burdens me. Sometimes i hate myself. I hate myself for not being a better person. I hate myself for not being good enough. I hate myself for hating myself. It's... sad.
Even my family sometimes hate me. I know they do. They might not show it but they act like it. Oh well...
Thanks for reading!
xoxo
January 24, 2012
Sehidup Semati
Hello there strangers! So, how's it going? I'm okay. Dah baik dengan Andzar dah :D Hehe. So anyway, this entry is about me and Andzar's movie. Yeah, it's called Sehidup semati. Wanna know why it's called Sehidup Semati? Dramatic, huh? Haha. Well, let's start the movie first. It'll make sense when i tell you the whole story. So, here it goes!
Part 1
It was day time. I was alone in my room. Then, Andzar came to my house. We went to my room and sat on my bed. We talked and made jokes and stuff. And then, he said i was cute. I denied. He wanted to make me stop denying, so he threw a pillow at me. And then i threw it back at him. Then we played pillow fight with each other. And then, he threw the pillow so hard, i fell and cried. He comforted me and i stopped crying. We continued playing and then i fell and he caught me before i could fall. We continued playing again, and he threw so hard, i sulked. He comforted me, but i still sulked. He gave up, so he said he wanted to jump off the building. I stopped sulking and i said, "Kite terjun bangunan sama-sama." and then he said, "Kalau macam tu, kite pun mati dengan sayang jugak lah." Well, I didn't want him to die, and he didn't want me to die too, so we agreed not to jump off the building. Instead, he jumped on my bed. So, we didn't play pillow fight anymore. Instead, we jumped on my bed so many times together.
Part 2
It was on the evening. Andzar was playing football on the field with his teammates. I watched them as they played. I was the 'tukang refillkan air'. Haha. And then, it rained. Andzar stopped playing and came to talk to me. I said, "I love you" and threw water at him and i ran. Andzar chased me and caught me. He said, "I love you too baby" and threw water at me too. We both ran and chased each other while throwing water at each other. We were always together.
Part 3
We went out to spend time with each other. We went to a lot of places. And then, i made a somewhat movie. It was already in the cinemas. Andzar said, "Jom tengok sama-sama. Kita berdua je dalam panggung tu. Takde siapa kecuali kita.". Awwww :') Hihi. Soyeah, we watched it together. Just the two of us. When the movie ended, he carried me and got into a taxi and... stuff. Haha. K jangan fikir lain -.- I forgot what happened after that. Kbye.
Part 4
Shit. I forgot. NNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Part 5
I. forgot. dammit. i. hate. my. short. term. memory. i. wanna. shoot. my. brain. and. hit. myself. on. the. head. please. just. please. oh. god. i. hate. myself. i'm sorry. bye.
Part 6
~COMMING SOON~
Hikhik. Sweet kan? :') So yeah, that's our movie. We made it ourself, ya know? We're awesome. Hihihi. So, the title is called Sehidup Semati because we always do things together. We spend time together. If he dies, i'll die too. If i die, he dies too. Btw, the title was given by Andzar. So yeah, there goes Sehidup Semati :)
Thanks for reading!
P/S : Please, just please, don't try to copy me. Don't try and make movies just because you see mine is sweet and you want to do it too. Yeah, i know i sound like i'm better or whatever. Just, please. Don't ruin this. I love our so-called movie. Sehidup Semati makes me happy. DON'T try to make me mad. K thanks. Bye.
xoxo
Part 1
It was day time. I was alone in my room. Then, Andzar came to my house. We went to my room and sat on my bed. We talked and made jokes and stuff. And then, he said i was cute. I denied. He wanted to make me stop denying, so he threw a pillow at me. And then i threw it back at him. Then we played pillow fight with each other. And then, he threw the pillow so hard, i fell and cried. He comforted me and i stopped crying. We continued playing and then i fell and he caught me before i could fall. We continued playing again, and he threw so hard, i sulked. He comforted me, but i still sulked. He gave up, so he said he wanted to jump off the building. I stopped sulking and i said, "Kite terjun bangunan sama-sama." and then he said, "Kalau macam tu, kite pun mati dengan sayang jugak lah." Well, I didn't want him to die, and he didn't want me to die too, so we agreed not to jump off the building. Instead, he jumped on my bed. So, we didn't play pillow fight anymore. Instead, we jumped on my bed so many times together.
Part 2
It was on the evening. Andzar was playing football on the field with his teammates. I watched them as they played. I was the 'tukang refillkan air'. Haha. And then, it rained. Andzar stopped playing and came to talk to me. I said, "I love you" and threw water at him and i ran. Andzar chased me and caught me. He said, "I love you too baby" and threw water at me too. We both ran and chased each other while throwing water at each other. We were always together.
Part 3
We went out to spend time with each other. We went to a lot of places. And then, i made a somewhat movie. It was already in the cinemas. Andzar said, "Jom tengok sama-sama. Kita berdua je dalam panggung tu. Takde siapa kecuali kita.". Awwww :') Hihi. Soyeah, we watched it together. Just the two of us. When the movie ended, he carried me and got into a taxi and... stuff. Haha. K jangan fikir lain -.- I forgot what happened after that. Kbye.
Part 4
Shit. I forgot. NNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Part 5
I. forgot. dammit. i. hate. my. short. term. memory. i. wanna. shoot. my. brain. and. hit. myself. on. the. head. please. just. please. oh. god. i. hate. myself. i'm sorry. bye.
Part 6
~COMMING SOON~
Hikhik. Sweet kan? :') So yeah, that's our movie. We made it ourself, ya know? We're awesome. Hihihi. So, the title is called Sehidup Semati because we always do things together. We spend time together. If he dies, i'll die too. If i die, he dies too. Btw, the title was given by Andzar. So yeah, there goes Sehidup Semati :)
Thanks for reading!
P/S : Please, just please, don't try to copy me. Don't try and make movies just because you see mine is sweet and you want to do it too. Yeah, i know i sound like i'm better or whatever. Just, please. Don't ruin this. I love our so-called movie. Sehidup Semati makes me happy. DON'T try to make me mad. K thanks. Bye.
xoxo
January 23, 2012
Us
Hi! So, what's up? How's life? Mine? Oh it's okay :)
So, yesterday as you all probably already know, i was merajuk with Andzar. Still merajuk btw. New record ; Being in a bad mood for 24 hours. Great, huh? No. Not great at all. I miss him. I miss him a lot. I miss my penguin :( Oh well...
Oh, wanna know why i called him my penguin? Well, you see, last month, (which is last year), we webcam-ed and chat with each other. He was using his brother's laptop. His brother's laptop is a Macbook. And, Apple products have these annoying autocorrects. So, i was talking about 'pengsan' which is faint. But when he typed 'pengsan', it didn't come out pengsan, suddenly it was penguin. He was really angry with those autocorrect things. I laughed a lot because of that penguin moment. And, since then, we talk about penguin and stuff like that. Cute, huh? Hikhik :>
Soyeah, i call him my penguin, and he calls me, his kucing :3 Ngeheheheheh oh god i miss him so much right now :c Oh, gotta go now! I'll continue later. Byebye :)
Thanks for reading!
January 22, 2012
Awesomely crazy
Name : Madihah binti Mohd Firdaus
Age : Currently 14
Date of birth : 14th August 1998
Born at : Kuala Lumpur
Siblings : 3
School : SMK Bukit Indah
Current phone : Blackberry Bold 1 (BB Pin ; 211B5892)
Ex's : Hafiz.
Age : Currently 14
Date of birth : 14th August 1998
Born at : Kuala Lumpur
Siblings : 3
School : SMK Bukit Indah
Current phone : Blackberry Bold 1 (BB Pin ; 211B5892)
Ex's : Hafiz.
Current boyfriend : Al-Andzar bin Azmi ♥
Other things about me : I'm Awesomely Crazy. I love to cam whore. A lot. I love photography and taking pictures with my nikon dslr. I love Koko Krunch, macarons, cupcakes, nasi goreng cina, nasi kerabu, nasi kak wok and many more. I love to eat. I like to read. I love Twilight and Peter Pan. Big fan of Paramore, Bruno Mars, Dev, Pixie Lott, Christina Perri, Katy Perry, Foster The People, The Script, One Direction and much more.
Sometimes i can be a bit hyper. Lompat sana lompat sini. Cakap banyak and stuff liddat. And sometimes i can be a bit emo and cry and feel like i just want to disappear.
I'm a bit shy with people that i don't really know. Once i know that person a lot, i'll be hyper to them and annoying and sometimes even disturb them a lot. And sometimes i'll sing eventhough i know my voice is horrible and i'll shout my friend's name's in public in front of everyone.
So, there goes me :)
With love, Madihah.
Page 22 of 366
Hey there peeps! So, how's it going? I've been good. Well, currently in a bit of a bad mood. Tengah touching dengan Andzar. Hah lol. That's normal. Kays.
Anyway, it's Chinese New Year! And, you know what? I have a looooot of homework that i haven't done. How exciting. Haha. But of course, maybe i'll do it tonight or something. I dunno. Eventually, i have to finish them all before school starts. Fun, huh? Pffts, not.
So, yesterday was Maiz's birthday. Maiz is my schoolmate and also one of my bestfriend's brother. Here's a shoutout to Maiz bin Zainal, HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY! Well yesterday i didn't get a chance to take a picture with him. Quite a busy guy eventhough he was the birthday boy. Weird. Haha.
I had fun at Maiz's birthday. It was at Mutiara condominium, by the swimming pool. There was a bbq there too. I went there with Farisah. At that time, not much people. After a few minutes, a bunch of guys came. A lot, ya know? Haha. They were Maiz's classmates and friends and etc. And then there was this time when all of Maiz's friends pushed Maiz into the swimming pool. I gossiped with Farisah and Myra and i went home at 11. Had lots of fun there! And of course, i texted with Andzar non stop :> He was so sweet yesterday :') K rindu dia *send text message* lol ok mengarut
Anyway, it's Chinese New Year! And, you know what? I have a looooot of homework that i haven't done. How exciting. Haha. But of course, maybe i'll do it tonight or something. I dunno. Eventually, i have to finish them all before school starts. Fun, huh? Pffts, not.
So, yesterday was Maiz's birthday. Maiz is my schoolmate and also one of my bestfriend's brother. Here's a shoutout to Maiz bin Zainal, HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY! Well yesterday i didn't get a chance to take a picture with him. Quite a busy guy eventhough he was the birthday boy. Weird. Haha.
So, that's all for now. I'll be blogging some more when my brain exploded and magically make me have an idea to write here. Cool kan? Ngeheheheh. Soyeah, byebye :)
With love, Madihah.
January 17, 2012
Page 17 of 366
Well hello there :) How's everyone? I'm fine. Yeah, everything's okay now :) I hope it'll be like that forever.
So, how was school? Mine was great :D Had a lot of fun and i laughed a lot today. On bm subject, my class went to the library. Me, Puteri, Sabrina, Alisya, Daniel and Mike sat in front of the public television. One of the PSS switched on the tv but we could only hear songs. It was kinda like a radio. Haha. We sang to some of the songs on the radio. Then, Mike brought his book, so all of us conteng-conteng lah, apalagi. Haha.
And then, Daniel was writing something on the book, then Sabrina touched his hair, Sabrina said it felt like touching a cat's fur. Alisya, Puteri and I felt his hair, and yeah, it was so soft, like a cat's fur. Weird, huh? Then Sabrina found one hair, she said it was gold in color. She pulled it out, and we looked at it closely, it was actually grey. lol. Then Mike said, "Daniel, you're oldddd" haha. Sabrina and Puteri was still touching Daniel's hair and they laughed about something, and then they pushed Daniel's head, like Daniel was being bullied. Then we all laughed hysterically! Haha.
All of us talked and made jokes and sang 'It will rain' by Bruno Mars. It was fun :D
After that, it was civic, the teacher told us to go to the Arts & Crafts' class. So, we went there. Alisya is a pengawas SPBT, so she had to do something at that time. So, Mike, Daniel, Sabrina, me and Puteri sat together at one table. We couldn't stop laughing! Yeah, had a lot of fun today :) I hope tomorrow will be like that too. Hihi.
Madihah.
So, how was school? Mine was great :D Had a lot of fun and i laughed a lot today. On bm subject, my class went to the library. Me, Puteri, Sabrina, Alisya, Daniel and Mike sat in front of the public television. One of the PSS switched on the tv but we could only hear songs. It was kinda like a radio. Haha. We sang to some of the songs on the radio. Then, Mike brought his book, so all of us conteng-conteng lah, apalagi. Haha.
And then, Daniel was writing something on the book, then Sabrina touched his hair, Sabrina said it felt like touching a cat's fur. Alisya, Puteri and I felt his hair, and yeah, it was so soft, like a cat's fur. Weird, huh? Then Sabrina found one hair, she said it was gold in color. She pulled it out, and we looked at it closely, it was actually grey. lol. Then Mike said, "Daniel, you're oldddd" haha. Sabrina and Puteri was still touching Daniel's hair and they laughed about something, and then they pushed Daniel's head, like Daniel was being bullied. Then we all laughed hysterically! Haha.
All of us talked and made jokes and sang 'It will rain' by Bruno Mars. It was fun :D
After that, it was civic, the teacher told us to go to the Arts & Crafts' class. So, we went there. Alisya is a pengawas SPBT, so she had to do something at that time. So, Mike, Daniel, Sabrina, me and Puteri sat together at one table. We couldn't stop laughing! Yeah, had a lot of fun today :) I hope tomorrow will be like that too. Hihi.
Madihah.
January 13, 2012
Sometimes, i wish i was a better person, so that i won't feel like i'm not good enough for anyone.
But i can't change that. I'm just not good enough for anyone. No one deserves me. No one.
I'm tired of people finding my mistakes and say a lot of bad things about me. Yes, i'm not perfect. I know that. But, you're not perfect either. No one is. Have you forgotten about that? It surely looks like you did. Well, now you know. But it's too late now. It's too late.
You know, the things 'perfect' people talk about other people. It's mean. It's rude. And not to mention, it makes you look ugly. Stop with that attitude. I know what i did wrong. But you thought you were right all the time. Stop that. It's... stupid.
I know that all of that is in the past now. I live in the present right now. But sometimes i stop and think to myself that i am never good enough. Because of you. You made everything worse. Miss perfect person. Hah. Funny.
Well, it's good that you've made a somewhat contract. But it'll never change how i feel towards you. You look ugly because your attitude is ugly. It's so ugly. No one can even think you're pretty if you treat people like that. You should know that. Since you're older than me, you should've known that since the past few months. But, i guess you were too caught up in the fight, that you forgot what you should've done, and what you shouldn't have did.
Well, saying i'm stupid won't make you smart. Saying i look like a hippopotamus' bottom won't make you any prettier. Saying i'm pathetic won't make you any less pathetic than i am. Saying i'm a 'control queen' won't make you be someone who had never controlled anyone before. And much-much more.
I hope you're happy. i hope you're satisfied with all of those mean words you wrote about me. I hope you're happy that i wanted to kill myself in front of you. Oh wait, that was a looooong time ago. Now, i want to live life to the fullest. So yeah, sorry to ruin your happiness :)
Now i want to stop here and just say thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. So much. Why? Because of you, i knew that there are guys out there like Hafiz. And, because of you, i know now that there are mean, rude, cruel and etc girls like YOU. Hoyeah, thank you a lot!
Chill dude, i'm not perli-ing you or whatever. I'm not mad anymore. I've moved on. That stupid fight, is nothing to me now. All of that, is in the past now. I can't do anything to change what happened that month. I can hate it, but i can't change it. That's life. I have to deal with it. And you have to deal with it too. As much as i hate it, i have to move on. And i have moved on. I'm relieved now. It's over. Everything is over. I just hope that things that happened that month won't happen again. Aminnn!
So yeah, have a wonderful year everyone! Live life to the fullest, it might surprise you ;) Make mistakes, and learn from them. That's life. Make sweet moments, and remember them forever. Assalamualaikum!
With love, Madihah.
But i can't change that. I'm just not good enough for anyone. No one deserves me. No one.
I'm tired of people finding my mistakes and say a lot of bad things about me. Yes, i'm not perfect. I know that. But, you're not perfect either. No one is. Have you forgotten about that? It surely looks like you did. Well, now you know. But it's too late now. It's too late.
You know, the things 'perfect' people talk about other people. It's mean. It's rude. And not to mention, it makes you look ugly. Stop with that attitude. I know what i did wrong. But you thought you were right all the time. Stop that. It's... stupid.
I know that all of that is in the past now. I live in the present right now. But sometimes i stop and think to myself that i am never good enough. Because of you. You made everything worse. Miss perfect person. Hah. Funny.
Well, it's good that you've made a somewhat contract. But it'll never change how i feel towards you. You look ugly because your attitude is ugly. It's so ugly. No one can even think you're pretty if you treat people like that. You should know that. Since you're older than me, you should've known that since the past few months. But, i guess you were too caught up in the fight, that you forgot what you should've done, and what you shouldn't have did.
Well, saying i'm stupid won't make you smart. Saying i look like a hippopotamus' bottom won't make you any prettier. Saying i'm pathetic won't make you any less pathetic than i am. Saying i'm a 'control queen' won't make you be someone who had never controlled anyone before. And much-much more.
I hope you're happy. i hope you're satisfied with all of those mean words you wrote about me. I hope you're happy that i wanted to kill myself in front of you. Oh wait, that was a looooong time ago. Now, i want to live life to the fullest. So yeah, sorry to ruin your happiness :)
Now i want to stop here and just say thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. So much. Why? Because of you, i knew that there are guys out there like Hafiz. And, because of you, i know now that there are mean, rude, cruel and etc girls like YOU. Hoyeah, thank you a lot!
Chill dude, i'm not perli-ing you or whatever. I'm not mad anymore. I've moved on. That stupid fight, is nothing to me now. All of that, is in the past now. I can't do anything to change what happened that month. I can hate it, but i can't change it. That's life. I have to deal with it. And you have to deal with it too. As much as i hate it, i have to move on. And i have moved on. I'm relieved now. It's over. Everything is over. I just hope that things that happened that month won't happen again. Aminnn!
So yeah, have a wonderful year everyone! Live life to the fullest, it might surprise you ;) Make mistakes, and learn from them. That's life. Make sweet moments, and remember them forever. Assalamualaikum!
With love, Madihah.
January 11, 2012
Depressed
Hi. Currently crying right now. Heh. Long story. Well, I feel so sad right now. Yeah, it has something to do with him. Yes, Andzar. But, it's okay. I've gone through this once. So, i'm used to it now. I'm just angry, sad, devastated, depressed, upset, disappointed and much more. Mostly disappointed though. I just want to sleep, and never wake up. Literally.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Well, this is going just good, huh? Pffts. You know what's better? That he doesn't know why i'm so sad right now! Hah, niceeeee. Thankyouverymuch. Yes, i'm still sad right now. Still sad. Uuuuu, greatttt. Just, great.
Oh gosh, i'm so freaking tired right now. I just want to sleep. I'd throw my laptop if i could. I'd throw everything if i could, really. I just hate this moment right now. I hate this feeling. I hate that i have to feel this way towards him. I don't hate him. I just feel sooooo disappointed. Till i cried. How pathetic can i be? Hah. Funny.
*3 minutes later
Okay so, i'm a bit okay right now. I guess. Ahaa, okay. It's just that, every word he says right makes me wanna cry. Weird, huh? Yes, it is weird. So weird. Heh.
okbye
January 9, 2012
The Story of us II
Hey there! So, i just wanted to write down (Or type? lol) how Andzar and I met. We've known each other since 2010. Crazy, huh? Haha.
I was at Tasnim's house at that time. Her house is at Bangi. We went to the park near her house. We sat on the slide, and on the grass beside the field where the guys played football, was him and his friends. Tasnim said she knew them. And then Andzar and Nazmi (his bestfriend) kept on looking at me. I felt weird since i didn't know them at all. lol funny. So, after that we left the park and i went back home. Then, Tasnim told me that Andzar liked me and whatsoever. And i was like, okayyyyy? Haha.
A few days after that, on the month of July, Andzar added me on facebook. Nazmi also added me too. Then we started chatting and all. But at that time, Andzar didn't like me anymore. And then, Andzar started to date someone. And she added me too. Hellyeah she's damn pretty! And she's so nice to me :D Hehe. And then, a lot of people from Bangi added me. And started to chat with me. But Andzar's girlfriend was the most nicest one to me :) And then some stuff happened. Andzar broke up with her, i was with Hafiz at that time. Then, on the month of October, after Hafiz and i broke up, Andzar and I started chatting. He asked for my number, so i gave it to him. We started to text and stuff. Weeks after that, he confessed that he likes me. I was shocked, of course. Then, weeks after that, he asked to be my boyfriend. I didn't accept him. I wasn't ready because of the whole break up thing. He was so upset when i didn't accept him, but he just stayed cool. And he never gave up. He kept on trying to make me his, for forever. How sweet :') Hihi
Days after that, i went to Ampang Point with Alkeef, and Andzar knew, he became so upset and pissed. I pujuk him and all, then he was okay. And then, Andzar and i continued texting and stuff. His friends added me on facebook, they kept on telling me to be in a relationship with him, and they always told me that he really likes me and he won't give up. I told them that i'm still not ready. But slowly, i got over Hafiz, cause i know he'll never be mine anymore. As i got over Hafiz, i started to like Andzar. He was so happy when he knew about that.
So, on 1st of January 2012, Andzar sent me a text that wrote :-
"Darling, since I saw you, I can't help thinking about you, I think I'm in love with you and I can't live without you. Would you be mine forever, Madihah? :) You are perfect for me. I love you, Madihah ♥"
Sweet kannnnn? :') I almost cried, seriously. I accepted him. And my heart kept on saying "Please don't make me regret this. Please don't make me regret this. Just, please don't." And now, he never fails to make me melt and i fell in love with him with his sweet words. Alhamdulillah :')
And so yeah, we text everyday and we've video chatted for 4 times already. Yeah, it was fun video chatting with him :> I couldn't stop smiling cause he kept on saying i look cute. Haha lol. And, i've heard him sing and yeah, he's quite good. Sometimes i melt when i hear his voice o_o Haha. Weird. And then, sometimes he would laugh about something so hard. I was shocked that he wasn't even embarrassed to laugh so hard in front of me like that. But yeah, his laughter makes me happy :) And sometimes when he smile, i melt a lot. Woohooo x) Oh and, sometimes, we would make up stories like a movie. And yeah, our so-called movie is so romantic and so sweet :'D We would imagine us throwing water at each other and running around the park together. Yeah, that's be nice if it came true. I hope it'll come true. Aminn! Oh and now we have reached 'Part 5'! The movie has parts now cause it's a different situation every part. Hellyeah it's awesome! YOU JELLY? STAY JELLY. lol no offence.
I was at Tasnim's house at that time. Her house is at Bangi. We went to the park near her house. We sat on the slide, and on the grass beside the field where the guys played football, was him and his friends. Tasnim said she knew them. And then Andzar and Nazmi (his bestfriend) kept on looking at me. I felt weird since i didn't know them at all. lol funny. So, after that we left the park and i went back home. Then, Tasnim told me that Andzar liked me and whatsoever. And i was like, okayyyyy? Haha.
A few days after that, on the month of July, Andzar added me on facebook. Nazmi also added me too. Then we started chatting and all. But at that time, Andzar didn't like me anymore. And then, Andzar started to date someone. And she added me too. Hellyeah she's damn pretty! And she's so nice to me :D Hehe. And then, a lot of people from Bangi added me. And started to chat with me. But Andzar's girlfriend was the most nicest one to me :) And then some stuff happened. Andzar broke up with her, i was with Hafiz at that time. Then, on the month of October, after Hafiz and i broke up, Andzar and I started chatting. He asked for my number, so i gave it to him. We started to text and stuff. Weeks after that, he confessed that he likes me. I was shocked, of course. Then, weeks after that, he asked to be my boyfriend. I didn't accept him. I wasn't ready because of the whole break up thing. He was so upset when i didn't accept him, but he just stayed cool. And he never gave up. He kept on trying to make me his, for forever. How sweet :') Hihi
Days after that, i went to Ampang Point with Alkeef, and Andzar knew, he became so upset and pissed. I pujuk him and all, then he was okay. And then, Andzar and i continued texting and stuff. His friends added me on facebook, they kept on telling me to be in a relationship with him, and they always told me that he really likes me and he won't give up. I told them that i'm still not ready. But slowly, i got over Hafiz, cause i know he'll never be mine anymore. As i got over Hafiz, i started to like Andzar. He was so happy when he knew about that.
So, on 1st of January 2012, Andzar sent me a text that wrote :-
"Darling, since I saw you, I can't help thinking about you, I think I'm in love with you and I can't live without you. Would you be mine forever, Madihah? :) You are perfect for me. I love you, Madihah ♥"
Sweet kannnnn? :') I almost cried, seriously. I accepted him. And my heart kept on saying "Please don't make me regret this. Please don't make me regret this. Just, please don't." And now, he never fails to make me melt and i fell in love with him with his sweet words. Alhamdulillah :')
And so yeah, we text everyday and we've video chatted for 4 times already. Yeah, it was fun video chatting with him :> I couldn't stop smiling cause he kept on saying i look cute. Haha lol. And, i've heard him sing and yeah, he's quite good. Sometimes i melt when i hear his voice o_o Haha. Weird. And then, sometimes he would laugh about something so hard. I was shocked that he wasn't even embarrassed to laugh so hard in front of me like that. But yeah, his laughter makes me happy :) And sometimes when he smile, i melt a lot. Woohooo x) Oh and, sometimes, we would make up stories like a movie. And yeah, our so-called movie is so romantic and so sweet :'D We would imagine us throwing water at each other and running around the park together. Yeah, that's be nice if it came true. I hope it'll come true. Aminn! Oh and now we have reached 'Part 5'! The movie has parts now cause it's a different situation every part. Hellyeah it's awesome! YOU JELLY? STAY JELLY. lol no offence.
So, that's it i guess. Cheers to the new couple! Hehe :3 I'm thankful to have him being called mine. I really am :') I love him, hellyeah. Of course i do. I hope forever really means, forever. InsyaAllah, it will :)
Hugs & Kisses, Madihah.
January 8, 2012
Relationships
Hey there. I'm bored right now so i'll make an entry about relationships. Haha. Okay, i will begin now.
Being in a Relationship : So, i am currently in a relationship now. Yeah, it's been great and all. Of course being in a relationship is better than being single. Well, you know, you see single people saying how great being single is cause you don't have to use much many to pay to text that person and etc. You know what? That's not the real reason at all. That's just an excuse. And, it just shows that you're 'happy' being single but really, you're not.
Being in a relationship doesn't involve having to text your gf/bf till you're bankrupt or whatever. It simply gives you that feeling of being loved. And yeah, it felt good. Of course there will be fights and stuff, and it's up to you to lose the fight and show that you care enough that you don't want to lose the fight rather than the one you love.
Being single : I have experienced being single. And it was okay. You'll feel lonely and all. But yeah, it was okay. Well, sometimes being single gives you the chance to meet other people. You can compare every girl/guy and see which one is worth it. But, there's this one thing that you like being single. It's that you won't get hurt. I mean, when you have a bf/gf, you'll feel insecure. And when the guy/girl is teasing you, you'll feel much more insecure and then you'll feel like you're not worth it. And then you get hurt.
Oh, and not to think seeing your gf/bf talking to other girls/guys. There's a quote about it, "When a girl see her boyfriend talks to other girls, she'll feel insecure. Cause, to her eyes, every other girl is her enemy" And yeah, that quote is true. So very true. But anyway, being single means you won't get your heart broken. But it also makes you feel lonely.
I know i sound like i know everything. This is just from my perspective. And i know a lot of people will agree with me. It's a common thing. I have a boyfriend now, and it's been okay. I know we've been together for a just one week. But i have been in a relationship with someone for 6 months. And i cried a lot.
To all those guys out there ; Please, just please, take care of your girlfriend. And when a girl talks to you all of the sudden, and then your girl says she doesn't really mind, don't believe her. Go to those girls that talked weirdly at you, and just say "I'm sorry, i have a girlfriend now. Please don't disturb us. Thank you." Yeah, that's make your girlfriend feel much better.
Oh and guys, don't be stupid. Like the time when a girl is flirting with you or whatever, LEAVE HER ALONE. She's stupid. She needs to back off and YOU need to stay away from her. Do not, and i mean, DO NOT, flirt with other girls when you already have a girlfriend eventhough you were only joking. Seriously. That is not something you can joke about. Just, be smart. And, walk away.
Well, I was a fool back then. I gave too many chances. I never knew that those things would happen. And now i know. I'm smarter now. And i don't hope too much. Cause i know i'll get disappointed in the end. And yeah, it's normal. Being single and being in a relationship has its benefits, ups and downs, pros and cons and etc. You just have to make the best of it. Appreciate everything. Open a new chapter. Make sweet moments and remember it forever. And i'm sure, very sure, everything will be worth it.
With love, Madihah.
Being in a Relationship : So, i am currently in a relationship now. Yeah, it's been great and all. Of course being in a relationship is better than being single. Well, you know, you see single people saying how great being single is cause you don't have to use much many to pay to text that person and etc. You know what? That's not the real reason at all. That's just an excuse. And, it just shows that you're 'happy' being single but really, you're not.
Being in a relationship doesn't involve having to text your gf/bf till you're bankrupt or whatever. It simply gives you that feeling of being loved. And yeah, it felt good. Of course there will be fights and stuff, and it's up to you to lose the fight and show that you care enough that you don't want to lose the fight rather than the one you love.
Being single : I have experienced being single. And it was okay. You'll feel lonely and all. But yeah, it was okay. Well, sometimes being single gives you the chance to meet other people. You can compare every girl/guy and see which one is worth it. But, there's this one thing that you like being single. It's that you won't get hurt. I mean, when you have a bf/gf, you'll feel insecure. And when the guy/girl is teasing you, you'll feel much more insecure and then you'll feel like you're not worth it. And then you get hurt.
Oh, and not to think seeing your gf/bf talking to other girls/guys. There's a quote about it, "When a girl see her boyfriend talks to other girls, she'll feel insecure. Cause, to her eyes, every other girl is her enemy" And yeah, that quote is true. So very true. But anyway, being single means you won't get your heart broken. But it also makes you feel lonely.
I know i sound like i know everything. This is just from my perspective. And i know a lot of people will agree with me. It's a common thing. I have a boyfriend now, and it's been okay. I know we've been together for a just one week. But i have been in a relationship with someone for 6 months. And i cried a lot.
To all those guys out there ; Please, just please, take care of your girlfriend. And when a girl talks to you all of the sudden, and then your girl says she doesn't really mind, don't believe her. Go to those girls that talked weirdly at you, and just say "I'm sorry, i have a girlfriend now. Please don't disturb us. Thank you." Yeah, that's make your girlfriend feel much better.
Oh and guys, don't be stupid. Like the time when a girl is flirting with you or whatever, LEAVE HER ALONE. She's stupid. She needs to back off and YOU need to stay away from her. Do not, and i mean, DO NOT, flirt with other girls when you already have a girlfriend eventhough you were only joking. Seriously. That is not something you can joke about. Just, be smart. And, walk away.
Well, I was a fool back then. I gave too many chances. I never knew that those things would happen. And now i know. I'm smarter now. And i don't hope too much. Cause i know i'll get disappointed in the end. And yeah, it's normal. Being single and being in a relationship has its benefits, ups and downs, pros and cons and etc. You just have to make the best of it. Appreciate everything. Open a new chapter. Make sweet moments and remember it forever. And i'm sure, very sure, everything will be worth it.
With love, Madihah.
January 1, 2012
Chapter 2012 Page 1 of 366
Well hi :) So, HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! I hope this year will be okay. Yeah, i hope. So, anyways, enjoy your school holidays :D Or.. what's left of it. Haha. Oh and, today is the date when Andzar and i are a couple :') Yeah, i moved on. I had to. And i love him. A lot. Hehe :> Bye!
xoxo
xoxo
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